Tip Your Advocate

So economists sometimes wonder why people tip at restaurants. It can make sense in some situations, but people often tip even when they are unlikely to return to the restaurant ever. Now, I don't have an answer, but I have a very non-econ idea that I'm ashamed of.

The basic concept is that the waiter, while she works for the restaurant, is also something of an independent operator. She mediates the interaction between the diner and the kitchen. Her loyalties are not entirely with the kitchen; in fact, quite the opposite. She is an advocate for her tables. She gets them their food as fast as possible, she corrects any mistakes, and if things go badly she tries to get the restaurant to give the customer free food. True, she may not have their best interests at heart when she recommends menu items, but in my experience waiters are actually pretty good about that. The major exception is the waiter in India who convinced me to get some vegetable curry that, while it tasted fairly standard at the time, later proved to have been heavily spiced rotten vegetables they were trying to get rid of.

In short, waiters are zealous advocates. They understand the nuances of a complex system and navigate it to serve their clients. Not to put too fine a point on it, waiters are like lawyers. I realized this when a Medici waiter gave me a free milkshake to make up for the fact that the kitchen took forever to bake my pizza. It was actually my second milkshake, because I love those Medici milkshakes. Even though I drank two of them, though, I only paid for one. That's what it must feel like to hire a lawyer and win a big case. The question is, if lawyers and waiters are so similar, why am I wasting 3 years learning to be a lawyer? I was already a pretty good busboy, and in time could have become an accomplished waiter.