A Few Notes About Beer

Beer is lovely. Unfortunately, just as snobs have taken over wine and threaten to take over coffee, tea, and countless other products, they have attacked beer as well.

Snobs aren't entirely bad. In general they bring a certain level of knowledge to their purchases, and they force producers to live up to certain standards. The problem is that snobs are much more interested in demonstrating their good taste than they are in, say, enjoying a good-tasting beverage. This is because consumption serves as a good signalling function... I could get into it more, but I've had several Rolling Rocks and don't care to think that hard. Suffice it to say that snobs learn a few rules about each product, and then apply those rules as a signal to others, not because the rules yield better-tasting beer, say.

So, Rolling Rock. It doesn't have a lot of flavor; it tastes mildly like grain and yeast and warm fuzzy happiness. Of course, it's not beer beer, but its characteristics are all pleasing.

So my recommendation is: drink lots of Rolling Rock. Or Budweiser (easily the best of the big beers; all-natural). My favorite, though, is Magic Hat #9. It's made in Vermont, and you can't get it out here. It has a mild apricot flavor, and it's just perfection. There's nothing quite like sitting around with your friends on a warm, lazy afternoon, drinking lots of beer, and bullshitting. Don't listen to the snobs; just remember that, unlike them, you might actually make love in a canoe if it suits your fancy.