Ambiguous Phrasings

Ambiguous phrasings, or phrasings that should be ambiguous:

1.  X has a hard on for Y.  Seems to me that in most contexts this would mean that X likes Y, right?  At the very least, X probably has some positive feelings about Y.

2.  X did a half-assed job.  This one has been much-noted.  What do we want here, a full-assed job or a no-assed job?

3.  Your money is no good here.  Sounds like a terrible thing to say to someone.

Billy, what are you doing?  Put your money away.  I told you your money's no good here.  No, don't ring that up, he's leaving.  Why did you do it, Billy?  Why did you come to my deli, of all places?  You give me no choice.  Why did you make me do this, Billy?  [beats the shit out of Billy in front of everyone]